You can change

A few years ago my wife and I had the opportunity to visit the Louvre in Paris. It’s spectacular for many reasons but one thing I still think about are the staircases. I was fascinated by the fact that the center of the steps was worn down from people walking on them for years. If these stairs could speak they would have many stories to tell.

As the steps in the Louvre can attest, we form habits that leave their mark in our life. For better or worse, our repetitive actions and thoughts turn into tracks that we more easily default to again and again. We literally create mental pathways that grow stronger through repetition (look up neuroplasticity). For instance, when one chooses to dwell on the negative aspects of a situation it trains their brain to see things from a negative and pessimistic point of view. This cultivates depression, anxiety, fear etc. The next time a similar situation arises their brain will more easily fall into the grooves they have already created.

This is a truth you can use to your advantage. I’ve met people that honestly believe they can’t improve at things. It becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. They always seem to be the same people that secretly want me to never improve or succeed at anything either. I want to be the opposite. I want to see people around me win! Your success doesn’t make me less successful, instead it serve as an invitation to dream more! Besides, the most successful people I know are the ones that love people really well. We are better together. Insecurity sees the achievements of others as threatening. Love celebrates the success of others.

Do you know anyone that always leaves you feeling uplifted and valued? I have a few friends that are incredible at spreading joy and reassurance. They are so comfortable in their own skin that they make you feel more confident just being around them. Not surprisingly, these same friends are generous and not intimidated by others around them having big wins. If you are one of these people I applaud you.

The good news is, you can change the way you think and the way you live. Audit your habits and cultivate ones that make you the kind of person you want to be. Don’t have self defeating dialogs that you play in your own head. Practice being who you truly are…


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